Un-Words, Pt. IX

It’s been a minute since we’ve had an un-word. That’s not because I haven’t come across hundreds between now and the last time I posted one. No, no. Don’t ever make the mistake of thinking that. Just as sure as your analog television no longer works without a converter box connected to it, people have uttered and written words. I’ve just been slipping. That’s all. So here goes it …

Labtop is not a word.

More often than not, when one speaks this un-word, they muster from every part of themselves a southern drawl that necessitates you emphasize the lab (i.e., the part of the “word” that makes it an un-word), severely exaggerating the “a” vowel.

Magic Johnson speaks of labtops in a Rent-a-Center commercial; one of my un-friends even refers to desktop computers as labtops (he also thinks Souljah Boy “reps ‘The Sip’” well, though, for what it’s worth); and before I bought The Machine I currently own, sadly, they weren’t selling labtops at Best Buy, Cowboy Maloney or any of my other local electronics retailers. Believe me. I asked. They showed me laptops instead. And when I implored them to show me what I’d asked for, alas, it seems there’s no such thing as a LABTOP. Webster’s dictionary confirms this.

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~ by MsInklination on November 24, 2009.

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